Category: Random Stories

I live in Abbotsford, BC.  It is on the south bank of the Fraser River, 60 km east of Vancouver.  It is Canada’s 23rd largest city, home to 133,000 people.  I’m not from here originally, and if I ever move away it’s unlikely I’d come back.  It is one of the warmest places in Canada, it’s one of only three cities that has an average annual temperature above 10 C.  It’s also one of the rainiest and the least windy.  Straight to the south is Bellingham, Washington, the least sunny city in the USA.

It placed fourth in a survey to find Canada’s most boring city.  (The winner, of course, was Ottawa, which is the Super Bowl of tedium.)   You can’t get dim sum here, or even a really top notch Mexican dinner.  We used to have an AHL hockey team, but it left for lack of fan interest.

It didn’t help that some Einsteins moved the minor league affiliate of the Calgary Flames – our local Canucks’ biggest rival – to our dull little berg.  Most games the fans would cheer for whoever was playing against Abbotsford.  On the upside, they had a loonie/twoonie night where you could buy a $1 hot dog and a $2 beer.  We each blew $20 on beer and needed help getting home.

One year not long ago, we led Canada by having the country’s highest murder rate.  The next year that left too, and we didn’t have a murder the entire year.

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Almost every picture you see of Abbotsford that is trying to hype the place contains an image of Mt Baker.  It looks great, but the snow capped volcano isn’t even in Canada, it’s in Washington State.

So having pumped the place up, you want to buy my house?

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If you live in an apartment, condo or townhouse, and have no aspirations to spend time driving off road, you should be forbidden from owning a full sized truck.  If your only use for this gas-sucking, growling monstrocity is to bully people in sensible cars and feel like a big tough guy for a while, then you also may need therapy.  There is a strong liklihood you are an aggressive driver who is causing accidents and anxieties wherever you go.  I was recently reading a study done by the Insurance Corporation of British Columbia, which rated the amount of personal danger certain vehicles were causing to themselves and others. Weight and BMI do play a very large role in the treatment and the outlook is cialis shop optimistic. Ashwagandha: Ashwagandha is cute-n-tiny.com cialis on line used in many Ayurvedic treatments as it has a lot of medicinal value. Ayurvedic cure to reverse erectile dysfunction is recently gaining the highest popularity as maximum men facing erectile troubles are choosing the concerned option as the doctors have a lot of experience in their field of expertise and thus, can deal with any crisis in treatment with efficacy and care. sildenafil 100mg price Several points which viagra low cost the doctor would keep in mind before suggesting you the pill is helpful in every sense.  It confirmed that the worst offenders on the road for causing accidents and bodily harm were pick up trucks of various makes and models.  Every time it snows, the ditches on my way to work are littered with trucks, while the little cars they mock go by uneventfully.

Of course, if you need a truck for work, or you actually go off-road to find a place to go camping, or you have some land and are hauling fencing or making dump runs, then a truck is for you.  I’m just thinking the world would be a little safer, and the air a little cleaner, if every truck owner who is tailgating in heavy traffic while imagining revenge on the guy who stole his lunch money in grade 6 was removed from his truck and given a Smart car.

I don’t watch a lot of TV, and I don’t buy gossip magazines.  This is lucky for me, because it permits me a little shelter from the Kardashian overexposure.  They have a reality TV show and are addicted, it would seem, to the attention.  The family pulls off one giant stunt after another to stay in the spotlight.  Sex tapes, fake marriages, a sex change here and there. Fine with me.  It just galls me how much coverage they get for ridiculous things like small domestic disputes, new hair styles or showing one of their enormous asses in print.  These people aren’t saving lives.  They don’t even entertain people in any talent-related way.  They don’t sing, dance, write or educate.  I guess it could be argued they act a little bit, but the merits of that are open to debate.  But there they are on the cover of every magazine in the grocery store, a gawdy troup of self-absorbed twits preening for the cameras.

So I missed having them shoved up my ass to some extent by consuming less than an average amount of media.  That’s good for me because as a hockey fan in Canada, I already have had the Toronto Maple Leafs shoved up my ass, and there is no  room for the Kardashians.

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How I feel Saturday evenings at 4pm when I realize the Leafs are on again.

 

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