If strangers wearing wet suits are tossing little fish at you from an aluminum bucket, you probably shouldn’t be wearing those yoga pants.
If the electric meter is sending radio waves through your brain, or Jesus has been sending you on personal missions, keep it to yourself. Most people think you’re nuts.
If you change phone numbers, tell your friends and family. I got a new number recently and people are calling every day for the old owner who has a lot of friends who don’t speak English.
When you’re driving, pay attention to what other drivers are doing. If you are going to turn right up ahead and a vehicle is waiting at that street for you, for God’s sake signal. If you are blocking the right turn lane, but you could let people turn by moving up six inches, do it.
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If you’ve had some fast food, take the trash to a garbage can. If you’re not near home, there are cans at every gas station and most bus stops. If you own a pick up truck and throw your trash in the back, clean it out sometimes, I see little tornados of litter come out of truck beds all the time.
If you are a waiter or waitress and I order something from you with a little alteration – no onions, no ice in my drink – write it the fuck down. About 60% of the time they screw it up, but I’m so dumb I just keep right on tipping.