I don’t know what’s going on, but the statistics say some people have been reading my blog. If you’re reading this, then the answer is at least partially you! Thanks, it’s reassuring.
In earlier posts I made mention of some 100 word stories I had written for a contest. I sure did like the one I wrote for Round 2! Oh boy, it was going to launch me into the final round where all the glittering prizes are. So… it failed. It didn’t even get an honourable mention. The genre was Historical Fiction, the action I had to include was shoving someone, and the word I had to use was ‘establish.’ Unless your house is currently on fire, or your dog is barfing up a newspaper, you will have time to read it.
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Coronation Day
Napoleon’s glorious moment had arrived! The cream of European society packed Notre Dame, while at the altar, Napoleon radiated power in silk robes embroidered with golden bees. The Pope walked slowly toward him, holding the Charlemagne crown above his head.
The Pope lowered the crown to place it on his head, but Napoleon snatched it out of his hands and shoved the pontiff, to the gasps and shrieks of the crowd. He put the crown on himself. “I hereby establish a Monarchy based on my greatness, not your Church,” he told the stunned Pope.
Napoleon rose, “France! Behold your Emperor!”
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The feedback from the judges was mostly positive. Their main complaint was that the point of view seemed to be off. One judge concluded his feedback with “please keep writing!,” as though I may be discouraged and ready to toss my laptop in the recycling bin. I thought they might scold me for using three exclamation points in a tiny story.
As for the story itself, Napoleon really did grab the crown away from the pope at the ceremony, but there are two versions of it. One group says Napoleon had arranged for the pope to hand the crown over, and it was agreed upon, so there was no tussle and everything was good. The other version is that the coronation was like what went down in my story where he pulled the crown away from the very surprised pope and gave him a short lecture about his greatness vs the Church. Sadly, no one had thought far enough ahead that wintery day in 1804 to bring a camera, and eyewitnesses never fail to see different versions of the same event.
Meanwhile, back in camera-mad 2024, I have now completed my third of four norms toward getting my FIDE Arbiter title. Someone suggested I should do a blog series about the journey to getting this title. Can you imagine how un-riveting that would be? I mean unless you’re captivated by chess lingo and long periods of observing people playing a board game, I think it would be sleepy time for anyone who tried to read it. I could publish pamphlets about it and have them available for use at sleep clinics.
Falling asleep on the board is usually a forfeit loss, especially if you have inhaled any pieces
Well it’s coming up to mid-August and time for my annual rant about fall. We’ve gone past mid-summer and the days are already noticeably shorter. Pretty soon everyone will be bundled in sweaters drinking hot, overpriced, pumpkin flavoured coffees and the Christmas shit will be in all the stores. The exits from those stores will be blocked by panhandling packs of snotty kids with fundraising crap of all manner. At least hockey will come along and provide us with a sane diversion to the declining atmospheric conditions and public begging. Almost enough to make you want to shove the Pope, right? I’m talking to you, Francis!
